Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Goals and Updates...

Before I get into this post let me say I love that you can "google" anything you want! I typed in "run motivation" and lots of good blog worthy images. I only used a few though...


So in November I set some goals. I was trying to keep from being a dumby setting NY resolutions that I know I wont keep so I decided to start early. You can see that post here. I have since made some changes to them and I of course want to share because you all love me and my life so much I need to be held accountable. So here are my revised goals…
· Complete a total of 25 15 miles per week (Monday- Sunday) with at least 10 8 of those miles done on the treadmill…*Who the hell was I kidding with this one? Hell there are at least 2 days per week I CAN NOT make it to the gym at all… SMH
· Shave a whole two minutes off my mile time by December 1, 2012. This did not happen consistently. Some days it did other days it definitely did not. I am no longer concerned about my mile time but my overall endurance. I WANT TO BE A RUNNER!!! Who cares if I run an 8 minute mile and then pass out??? So the new goal is – run/jog- more than I walk while on the treadmill building up to being able to just run for 30 minutes total.
· Work out at least 6 5 days per week for at least 45 minutes at a time (6 would be great but I have to be realistic!!!)
· Dedicate 15 minutes per day to my LPC test (more once registered)- I HAVE SO BEEN DOING THIS!!! YAAAY
· Blog at least twice a week with one of the blogs being an update on these and possibly other goals (I have been totally slacking on this but I am trying yall. Thanks for reading!!! *add an official weigh in day post with scale pictures, starting January 1, 2013*

Now what is goal setting without REWARDS!!!!!! SO I have given myself little rewards along the way. I am definitely broke as shit for now working class so I had to space these goals out! LOL… here they are:

· Lose 15 pounds- buy some one new cute gym outfit (as of today I am 8 11 pounds down from my unbelievably high tear jerking start weight)- I am tired of looking a hot GARBAGE TRUCK of a mess and all these people are in the gym matching there outfits like they are headin to a party..
· Lose 25 pounds- buy new gym shoes  pumps from Bakers with the bag to match
· Lose 40 pounds- go wedding dress shopping and not cry in the dressing room – (that’s a different post) PLEASE LET THIS HAPPEN BY MARCH!!!!
· Lose 65 pounds- Hello old body, new wardrobe and most importantly- WALK DOWN THE ISLE FULL OF CONFIDENCE IN A MERMAID/ FIT AND FLARE DRESS AND MARRY MY BEST FRIEND!!!! The date is officially set to November 30, 2013.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Pictures, Workouts, In-laws Oh MY!!

Hello out there! LOL Ok so so much has been happening let me just upload some phone pics so I can remember share with you because I know you care LOL
My hair is cute though LOL
Well this was me Monday, and speaking of which it won. I had a rough Sunday (See post) so Monday had a head start on me. Well to top that off I did not work out. I know I'm losing with that but I did not overindulge in any food, sweets, or alcohol! Like I told myself this morning today is a new day for me to get it right.... I met the future in laws this weekend and it went very well!!!! They liked me they liked me *does happy dance* and here are some pictures from that trip. If you follow my Instagram and you SHOULD!!!! you have seen some of these!

Riding along snapping like a tourist! LOL

Dinner Drinks
Light show

The Arch
My baby

at the Flea market  playing around

The fiance, His Father, and my mini me

On the road headed there

Thursday my little one was sick and I had to pick her up from school early. Well the lady slid me a piece of paper making sure I knew she could not come back until 24 hours fever free later. I'm thinking lady she is 8 I have done this a time or two!!!... Anywho I know I have talked trash about my job and while I meant most of it and the pay is crappy (wait where was I going with this) on Friday I took my baby with me and this is what she did.... And no she did not come into any contact with the clients. Fridays are my light days and when I had a client she went into another room.
Watching TV enjoying being sick

I wheeled in the TV so she could be entertained
 So I guess there are some perks to my job. No one batted an eye. Sure she cant come daily but hey it was an emergency. Now what you really want to know is have I been working out. YES I HAVE!!!!! I say that with such pride because it is so easy for me to lose focus and start saying oh I will do it tommorow. I am going to start my 30 day shred count over because I have not been consistent, and I really want to get in 30 workouts in 30 days. That wont be happening until Jan 4, 2013 though. In the mean time I will be doing it in the mornings along with my other stuff. I am just no longer counting the days because I missed so many. And because we all do it here are some sweaty pics LOL


Notice the outfits are different LOL I have been doing it!!! Go ME!!! Well I believe that about sums up things this way! Hope all is well with you and your goals, and you are done shopping because it is getting wreck less out here LMBO!!!
*sips water as I try to make sure I get it all in before I go home*

Rest in peace Angels

Words cannot express the feelings I have right now. I’m somewhere between pissed and rageful and numb. I understand there is an order of things and people die but why is today’s world so cruel. My aunt was the victim of a drive by shooting. She did not survive. This happens just days after a madman goes into an elementary school and goes on a killing spree. WHY? What is it that makes people think it is ok to take a life? What’s worse is that crime happens so often that society is becoming desensitized to such acts. Acts that effect the country at large. While I did not know any of the children the thought that it can happen to my own daughter will make me hug her a little tighter and not care that she is trying to stay up past her bedtime. Some people who did not know my aunt will think twice before standing outside (which is very sad). They will give the slow approaching car a second and maybe third glance. See crime hurts everyone. Not just the immediate victims and their families but everyone. It reminds us that one any given day at any school, on any street bad things are possible…

RIP Louise Carter, and all the new baby angels from Newtown…

Monday, December 17, 2012

Lose Lips!!!!

SO we are having a great trip and talking about coming back and my daughter says she wants to come back to visit “brians” family. NEWS FLASH!!!!! My fianc├ęs name is Jeff!!! Brian is the ex. So mortified is an understatement of what I was feeling. But what do you do? My daughter seemed to feel bad because she couldn’t even hold her head up. JEFF tried to shrug it off but he was feeling some kind of way, and who can blame him… So ladies what would you do? Well I never know what to do*shot out to all you know it all mommys who have it all figured out* so I made her apologize asked him if he was ok and tried moved the hell on. Needless to say the mood shifted dramatically… Let me give you some back story when I was dating Brian (and was 30 pounds lighter*sigh*) Zahiyah spent the whole day calling him Nate (the one before him)… Yep my kid is loose lips McGEE LOL… I really felt bad for Jeff. I mean what was he thinking? Like oh I have done all these things for you two and you call me some other guy? Or maybe I am reading too much into it and an 8 year old made a mistake and this is not the end of the world….who knows… I never do

Monday, December 3, 2012

Monday and we have a DATE!!!!!

Welcome back!!!! LOL just kidding I'm the one that has been gone... ITS MONDAY!!!! So honestly it was tie between Mr. Monday and I. Work was ok, the scale gods were merciful, and work was uneventful for the most part. So lets see what have I been up to aside from sucking at my goals... Oh yea I HAVE A WEDDING DATE!!! The ceremony and reception venues have been booked and I will be married on November 30, 2013. *pops it and drops it like its hot, and flips my hair* ok Im back!!! LOL... So ready for some randomness and updates sure you are that's why you are still reading, oh and WELCOME to my new followers!!!

I woke up a little late and this was breakfast!

May just make this breakfast so I will be sure to have something

So yes I slipped up and had one of these the other days... I should have just gone for liquor because this thing while delicious is FULL of sugar!!!

December 1 was mini me's birthday. We had a small family thing and it went well! I am obsessed with We love princess Tiana so I had to have this cake that's the cake we chose! 

Recently we looked at old pictures and she saw her first birthday and decided she wanted to recreate the look!... Im on a never ending diet so I said go for it!!!

8 years ago God saw fit to send me an Angel!!! Love this Diva

I became lazy and just stopped trying the holidays and traveling for the wedding got in my way and I didn't exercise as much but, I managed to control my eating and make healthy choices so my weight did not go up! the one pound I did gain left. I guess all the water drinking does work! Here are some meals I took pictures of...

My fiance makes the best Salmon ever!!!!
Lunch was catered at work one day

12.45 mile! the time is slowing going down!!!

Today I worked out and was in a grove and at 9 minutes I had completed .77 of a mile and because I'm huge, run weird and was trying to stay focused and keep running then I hit the emergency stop and my information was lost. I was SOOOOO pissed and I'm sure I could have beat my time. Oh well that is just motivation for tomorrow!!! 

So how have you all been since I been gone? How was your holiday?

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Monday won...its Tuesday

Ok ladies so let me honest and quick. Monday made me its bitch!!!! I was so tired and I am not sure why. I slept more than anything yesterday after work, not sure why. I guess I will blame it on my hormones. As you can see by the ticker I did not pile on the miles #epicfail So I am modifying that goal to only 15 miles a week. There are two days a week that I just will not be able to go to the gym so I have to be realistic and not set my self up for failure.... Umm what else was I supposed to do? Blog, yep didnt do that either LOL... I dont know what happen and I will be honest I dont see too much happening this week due to the holidays. No I will not be overeating and yes I will be doing some type of workout but not the gym and nope not thinking about the miles.... Just being honest with me!!!! I have been studying for my LPC test though!!! LOL so something is right for me!!!!... Ok I have to go but let me leave you with this...

Be thankful for the small things because if your not how will you ever appreciate the big things!!!!

Wishing everyone a safe and happy holiday season..

Monday, November 12, 2012

Monday management... on a Monday! LOL

Its Monday bitches! Lovely ladies that follow my blog!!! How is it going? Ok so it is Monday and surprisingly I am feeling good feeling great!!! I definitely won. I was asked to speak to a big wig of the company and I was not a whistle blower! Ok really they just didn't ask the right questions! LOL ok seriously I spoke very well, and made my supervisor proud (like he asked me to right before the interview)!! … I feel accomplished and I am praying super hard for things (that will be disclosed later) that I want, well feel like I need!
So I thought I would talk about my love affair with “weigh in days”. I LOOOOVE getting on the scale and seeing the number drop however we have all had those weeks were we skip dessert, work out, drink water, you know ALL the things we should do. Then we step on the scale and NOTHING or WORSE some gain… I cannot deal with a gain. It makes me binge I feel discouraged and overeat. Is it just me? I understand that not every week there will be a loss but geesh can there be no gain????? Ugggh… As a result I am toying with weighing every two weeks. Really I am just trying to find what works for me and keeps me loosing… stay tuned for that
Ok enough of that. I am feeling good and need to get some family time in… So here it is… I’m doing well with all my preset goals except my water intake sucked today… I will try really hard but I just don’t like water bring on the sweet tea must do better. This may be slowing me down, so a change must come... Anywho today I did a total of 6 miles 4 of those on the bike. Oh I also shaved a few seconds off the mile time!!! 
Mile time- 13.17... slowly coming down
Still on treadmill.... TIRED!!!!

I have been encouraged to add strength training to boost the weight loss. That in mind today I did upper body weights. It may be time for me to utilize that free personal training you get when you join the gym so that I can get some kind of weight lifting plan because as of now it’s a free for all me just doing what I see others do or have done in the past or saw on Pinterest LOL… And of course some pics…

After workout!!! (I had a cami sports bra on under the shirt) Look at all that sweat (fat crying tears)

Leaving the gym... OMG my hair

So this weekend the fam and I checked out a new church as we are in search for a church home!

Me and mini me...notice the hair then look at the workout pics

Babe is never ready for the car photo shoot... LOL

Mini me ready for church!!!

I washed my hair to be pretty for church... See post workout pic and it is once again a mess!!!! LOL
SO how was your Monday whats new???

*chokes and gags on water to increase daily water intake*

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Goal Setting Time!!!!!!

So my long time and new readers know I am desperately trying to lose weight. So after some inspiration from SUSAN to “add on the miles” I have decided I will track my miles per week which I have never done before. I have also decided to continue to take group exercise classes whenever possible because I am embarrassed to stop before the class is over LOL. This way I am sure to get the full 30-60 min of the class plus my miles. So starting Monday (it feels good to say that and know that I have been working out and not binge eating) here are my new goals:
  • Complete a total of 25 miles per week (Monday- Sunday) with at least 10 of those miles done on the treadmill… (I have a new thing where I ride the bike when I am tired and while I want to count those miles I also need to be getting my walk/jog/run on)
  • Shave a whole two minutes off my mile time by December 1, 2012
  • Work out at least 6 days per week for at least 45 minutes at a time
  • Dedicate 15 minutes per day to my LPC test (more once registered)
  • Blog at least twice a week with one of the blogs being an update on these and possibly other goals
Now what is goal setting without REWARDS!!!!!! SO I have given myself little rewards along the way. I am definitely working class so I had to space these goals out! LOL… here they are:
  • Lose 15 pounds- buy some one new cute gym outfit (as of today I am 8 pounds down from my unbelievably high tear jerking start weight)
  • Lose 25 pounds- buy new gym shoes pumps from Bakers with the bag to match
  • Lose 40 pounds- go wedding dress shopping and not cry in the dressing room – (that’s a different post) PLEASE LET THIS HAPPEN BY MARCH!!!!
  • Lose 65 pounds- Hello old body, new wardrobe and most importantly- WALK DOWN THE ISLE FULL OF CONFIDENCE IN A MERMAID/ FIT AND FLARE DRESS AND MARRY MY BEST FRIEND!!!!

Looking at these numbers it seems so hard. But what is harder is not being able to come out of the dressing room because you are ashamed and on the verge of tears, being winded from tying your shoe, changing clothes 1000 times every morning looking for something that doesn’t make me look sooo big, and constantly pulling on my shirt to hide the rolls that everyone can see and in my mind are staring at…. So I think going to the gym and popping in a workout DVD when I can’t make it will be just fine!

Thinking my poooor hair... smh

Turbo Jam Cardio Party 3... it won today... I tried to stay "high tempo" the whole tape...

Oh yea does anyone know how to add one of those mile trackers to your blog?...

What do your tears say?

So this morning when the alarm went off I was NOT feeling it in a major way....

Thinking... noooo its not Friday

My clients often ask me who I talk to. I tell them my dad which is true but with him having his own issues I am going to talk to YOU… Yea this one is emotional so buckle up, or run LOL either way here is what I went through at work sitting at my desk…

I often ask my clients “what are your tears saying right now” and they give me a look that says “huh”. So today as I cry I ask myself the same thing…. I have several answers and none at all. I know that money is tight and I hate that the Mister is working to jobs because “we have a wedding to pay for” but should I not be happy that he is a hard worker and does not mind going the extra mile. I have been in this job and this city for about 2 years so my paycheck has not changed (yep no raises hello non profit unless you are one of the higher ups) so why is it suddenly so hard? Why now do I feel stretched soooooo thin that breathing seems hard? Ok so I have been gaining weight for a while and have been to the doctor and now have the answer as to why and no ladies I’m NOT pregnant (don’t curse me like that) I have some bull shit hormone disorder (more on that later) so why now am I upset? Should I not be happy that I am finally committed to working out, eating well and taking my meals one meal at a time, have great weight loss and exercise blogs to stalk read daily, and have joined a wonderful online weight loss support group, (yea I don’t say much but I read it!!!) and finally have more than 1 follower to call me on my crap when I over eat or miss the workout support me. So really what is wrong? What are my tears saying? Or have they just been building up and the dams are broken.  The financial strain has been there and so has the weight so why today do I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders?....

I actually let the tears hit the desk...

Then I pulled it together and went back to work and no one ever knew. So who do you talk to? Who saves the super hero?

Time to grow up

What a world wind of emotions. It never ceases to amaze me how messy humans can be. My ex’s opinion of my engagement is null and void and was not a needed conversation to have… LOL it is actually funny though because people love to run and tell what I am doing so I guess I should be flattered. I will say this though. I am entering into a MARRIAGE this is my home and my family. ANYBODY that is not for this union is against and will be cut. I am at a place where God has blessed me and now I understand why friends are lost in the process. It is saddening that the friends who were all for me when I was chasing loser guys, gaining weight, and being unhappy are a no show now that my priorities have changed. I hate to say this but it’s like they want to see you doing bad. Oh well they will get no more of my attention. I love my family and we have mini me to raise, weight to lose, a wedding to plan and finance, and a lifetime to spend together…. HI HATERS!!!!! *flips hair and looks at left ring finger*

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Its a new week!!!!!!

Let me start by saying GO VOTE!!!!!!... this is not a political blog so I don't care you who vote for but OBAMA is Amazing!!!!!!

Hello out there! Here we are on a Tuesday and I am doing my Monday post so I know you are thinking Monday won this week. Buuuuuuuut that's not true. It was a definite tie LOL. It was my first day back at work and that went ok.... A bunch of clients did not show so I did some paperwork. I had two OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) clients so I scattered my desk intentionally.... Cruel huh? NOOOO its to help with the compulsions LOL.

Me wanting to be at home LOL
My desk... Drives them and sometimes me crazy!!!!!

So I stayed at work later than usual which tears my schedule up because of traffic and getting mini me and blah blah so I did not make it to the gym. No worries though Chalene is always there!!!! I did Turbo Jam even though I really did NOT want to. She can be a bit cheesy when you really don't want to work out... "Now pump it" LOL... Its all good because I sweated and I was moving which is always the goal....

Cardio Party 3... and look who made an appearance  "Ms. Bling" lol
Me before I pressed play

Those are me after the workout... I tried to smile and look all happy because too often my workout pictures look like I want to do bodily harm to someone LOL. Working out is fun, or at least that is what I am telling myself!!!!

 The family and I went to Chattanooga for the weekend and here are some pictures...

I dont think Babe enjoyed my impromptu photo session while he was driving LOL

Thats better babe!

My mini Me!!!! Love her

Just so you can understand my hair struggle here is a before and after. I washed my hair and blow dried it then flat ironed it. I have to do this at least twice a week, and more when I am working out daily or I am forced into a pony tail.... The struggle is real!!!!

So as far as my mini goals... I sucked at water intake, and over indulged on Chic-fil-a at work on Monday but I worked out, and spent 15 minutes studying for the big test!

How have you guys been? Whats new?

*sips tea and thinks about doing homework* LOL
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